baby, you're a firework
by crazyaboutthem
Summary: "She may have driven past a few red lights, but she doesn't really care. All she can hear in her mind is Finn's voice, and how scared and upset he sounded. She presses the accelerator even harder." - Finchel AU


**A/N: Hey guys! So, little heads up, this is angst, and I may get a lot of hate because of this fic since it makes reference to Cory's addiction. I just couldn't get the bathroom scene out of my mind where she helps him and loves him no matter what, so be warned. With all of that said, if you want, read on, nad I hope you like it! Love you and consider yourselves warned!**

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><p>She get's the call on a Friday night at 2:37am.<p>

"Hello?", she answers groggily.

"Rach," she hears him whisper.

"Finn? What time is it?" she asks, sitting up on bed.

"Rach," he breathes again and she hears his anguished tone. She gets worried.

"Finn, are you okay? What's wrong?" she asks.

"Rach, I'm so sorry," he cries.

"Finn, what's going on? What are you sorry abo-." The line goes dead before she can finish her sentence.

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><p>She's always been careful and respected the law. Not tonight. She's never driven faster. She knows what's going on, and she's scared as fuck. She may have driven past a few red lights, but she doesn't really care. All she can hear in her mind is Finn's voice, and how scared and upset he sounded. She presses the accelerator even harder.<p>

When she gets to his apartment, she knocks and knocks and knocks, and no one answers. She's on the verge of tears as she remembers the key under the mat. She lunches for it and opens the door to find an empty living room. She runs for the bedroom only to find it empty as well.

She sees the bathroom door is ajar and there's light coming from inside. She goes to the bathroom and there he is. Sitting on the tub, dressed, a bunch of needles around him, unused, and one in his arm, also unused. She runs to him, gets the needle out of his arm, grabs the rest of them, empties them in the toilet, flushing it, and trashes the needles on the floor. She'll throw them out later. Right now she needs to focus on Finn, who's still sitting in the tub, really still, a numb expression on his face.

She goes to him, and kneels next to him outside the tub. "Finn?" Nothing. She tries again. "Finn?" Still nothing. She gets in the tub, sits astride him and grabs his face gently. "Finn," she whispers. Finally he looks at her and he breaks down crying. She holds him and shushes him as he cries and cries and keeps saying _I'm sorry, I'm sorry. _

Later, when he's calmed down, she gets him out of the tub and fills the tub with hot water and some soap and really, whatever she finds in the bathroom, things she knows he only has because of her, because he knows how much she loves baths. When the bath is set she turns to him and undresses him, and while she undresses herself he gets in the tub, followed by her, sitting in between his legs, her back to his front.

After a while of complete silence she grabs a sponge and starts washing him. His chest, his legs, his back. When she reaches his arms she washes gently over the scars. She washes again and again and keeps washing them. She doesn't know why, maybe she's hoping they'll disappear, which she knows is completely impossible, but still. He lifts his other arm and grabs her wrist to stop her.

"Stop. They won't just go away, no matter how much you wash them," he whispers.

"I know," she whispers back. After a few minutes of silence she adds, "I wish they could."

He sighs, as he holds her to his chest. "Me, too. Me, too."

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><p>An hour later they're lying in bed, her holding him, as tightly as humanly possible.<p>

"I know it's pretty lame to say this, but, this is the strongest I've been, you know?" he says, after a while of hearing nothing but the sound of their breathing.

"What do you mean?" she asks.

"Once I put my mind to it, I'm never able to stop, let alone call someone. But tonight, right before I was going to do it, I thought of you, and I felt so confused. Because, for the first time in forever, I could think of something that would bring me more excitement, more satisfaction, that would make me feel fuller than the drug. You. Being around you makes me feel so much better, and I know, okay? I know it's horrible being compared to a drug, and I'm sorry I'm putting you through this, and you deserve so much better, but-."

She puts a finger to his lips to shush him. "Hey, don't do that. You have no idea how glad I am that you were strong enough to stop and to call someone, and even gladder that someone was me. And now you're telling me this all came from me. I'm just happy, because this is the start, Finn. Tonight, you beat it. And this could be the start of you beating it forever."

He smiles at her. "Thank you. But it's still early to jump to that conclusion, don't you think? I'm still me, Rach. I'm still a junkie."

"Please do not refer yourself as that. And being an adict is not who you are. It's just one more crossroad in your life. But it doesn't define you, Finn. And it won't. And all I'm saying is that it's a start. And that's good enough for me, as it should be for you as well."

"You're amazing, you know that?" he whispers, amazed.

"So are you, Finn. You just need to discover that. And that might take time, but I'll help you through it. I'll be here for you every step of the way. You know why?" she asks. He shakes his head. "Because, as hard as it is for you to believe it, I love you."

He's crying, and she's crying too. She knows he feels like he's unlovable. He doesn't see that he's completely surrounded by love. He has it in spades. His mother, Burt, Kurt, Santana (in her own way, but still), Puck, and herself. She never thought she'd love him as much as she does right now. And lots of people don't understand their relationship. Kurt himself thought she'd hurt him more than he already was. But she's so glad they all allowed her to stick around and prove them wrong.

"I love you, too, Rach."

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><p>The next morning she's making breakfast when he wakes up and walks into the kitchen.<p>

"Good morning," she says, as she flounces to him and kisses him. "I made pancakes."

He half smiles and says _thank you_ as he takes a seat and starts eating. She sits next to him and eats her cereal, in silence.

"You're not going to ask?" he says, after a while.

She knows what he's talking about. "I figured you'd tell me when you were ready."

He nods. After a minute he starts talking. "A letter came in the mail yesterday. It said that yes, my dad overdosed in some motel in the land of nowhere. And my mind started reeling. Started wondering _what if I'm no better than him? What sets us apart?_ And I just lost it. And, God, Rach, I know it's lame to put an excuse to it, and to just mope after everything-."

"Finn, Finn. Stop, okay? If it's the way you feel, there's no need to explain to anyone. They're your feelings, period. There's really no other way around it. But, Finn, you are so different from your father. I know what he did hurt you, and still hurts sometimes. But you have to let it go. He had his own share of problems to deal with and they were too much for him. Please don't let it be too much for you too. You ask yourself what sets you two apart. Decisions, Finn. Your life choices can be different from his. You don't wanna be your father? Then don't be your father. Be yourself. Live your own life and let him go."

She takes a deep breath after her speech, and she goes to keep eating her cereal, to let him process what she just said, but before she can grab the spoon he grabs her, and kisses her and keeps kissing her. She deepens the kiss as he lowers them to the kitchen floor.

Afterwards, when they're sated on the kitchen floor, her ear on his chest, listening to his heartbeat, he sighs. "I'm scared," he whispers.

"Of what?"

"Of being alone."

She looks up at him as he looks down at her. "Okay," she whispers.

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><p>They agree on a couple of months of rehab. Not just the two of them, but his whole family and friends of course. They had a big meeting at his parents' house and they all agreed it was for the best. His mom cried, and said she was proud of him, before she hugged her and whispered <em>thank you<em> in her ear with tear filled eyes. Kurt came up to her and said he was glad she proved him wrong, also thanking her. They all hugged him one by one and whispered words of encouragement to him as she watched. When their eyes connected she gave him a meaningful look. _See? You are loved by many._

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><p>A couple of months later she gets another call. This time it's 12:45am.<p>

"Rach?"

"Yes," she answers.

"Will you come pick me up?"

"Of course! Right now?"

"Yeah."

"Be there in fifteen minutes."

"Cool."

"Oh, and, Finn?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you," she says smiling.

"I love you too, babe," she can feel his smile.

She hangs up and she speeds through the streets, though this time, for a whole different reason. He's finally getting out of rehab today, and she can feel he's completely different, better.

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><p>Finally they get to his apartment and he goes to his room to unpack, while she goes to the kitchen to get some snacks.<p>

"Rach?" she can hear him call from the bedroom.

She smiles as she walks to him. "Yeah?"

"What's all this?" he asks, pointing to his closet, which half of it is now filled with her clothes, as well as half of his drawers, and if you check the bathroom, you'll find two toothbrushes.

"Well, I know you said this some time ago, and if you want me to change it I'll do it, but a couple of months ago you said you were scared of being alone, and I promised you that I'd be here for you through every step of the way and help you in any wan I can. So I moved in. If you want me to move back out-."

She never got to finish her sentence as he kisses her and throws her on the bed.

"Please, don't ever leave," he says, crawling on top of her.

"Okay," she says right before their lips touch. And she doesn't. And he never has another relapse again.

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><p><strong>AN2: Well guys, that's it. I hope you liked it. And I hope you don't hate me for having written it. Love you :)**


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